Last Sunday morning we discussed the home life of Timothy, with his grandmother Lois and his mother Eunice helping to rear Timothy in the ways of the Lord. I mentioned the fact that Timothy’s father is not mentioned (we really do not understand why). Due to their efforts, Timothy had become a helper to the Apostle Paul, and as Paul writes his last letter, he is trying to steel Timothy for his loss of Paul. Paul’s letter – his last written words – encouraged Timothy to faithfulness and continued effort in the Lord’s kingdom. Timothy was who he was because of his grandmother, mother, and the apostle Paul. This teaches us that grandmothers, mothers, grandfathers, fathers, as well as the extended family in the church, all have a responsibility to help our children to become what God intends for them to be.
Church, as a family, we are to here to help families as they go through their struggles I BELIEVE THIS IS ESPECIALLY TRUE NOW, due to the way our culture is going. There is a lot of anxiety, and struggles for the souls of men. We lose our children to the propaganda and lies of those who have abandoned Christ and his church. Consider two to four hours a week in assembling with the church, versus the six to eight hours (or more) daily hearing the propaganda of the world as taught by public schools and universities – is it any wonder why we lose our children? We ask this question (as was asked years ago by Ken Tyler of THE EXHORTER of Arab church of Christ, in Arab AL. March 4, 1990). See below
WHO IS RAISING THE CHILDREN?
A well-dressed couple came into a toy shop with their two children. “We want some toys that will keep the children entertained,” said the mother. “My husband and I both work and the children are alone a great deal.” The salesgirl showed them a variety of games and play equipment, but to each there was some objection. “It seems to me,” the mother said impatiently, “that if you knew what we are really looking for, you could find it among all these toys.” The salesgirl sighed, “I’m sorry, ma’am but I believe what you are really looking for – what your children want and need – is a mother and father, and we don’t sell those here!”
The story describes our situation in America to a “T”. Many parents have hired someone or bought something to do their job. Many children are literally growing up without a mama and daddy. It is a sad day when we become so busy that we do not have time to be parents. Someone or something will raise our children. It may not be us, but the job will be done. I was at an Arab High School basketball game this week and saw and heard something I could not believe. The opposing team’s cheerleaders got out on the court and lead the student body in a filthy cheer. I mean FILTHY! I thought, where are their parents? What about school administration? I was embarrassed and ashamed for my family to have heard such talk. Have we become so busy that our children do not even know right from wrong? (This was written March 4, 1990 – consider how this is today – TOMMY).
The Lord said of Abraham, “For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment; that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he has spoken of him.” (Genesis 18:19). Oh, how we need to be parents like Abraham! Many parents are just ignoring their SPIRITUAL RESPONSIBILITIES. And seem not to even care. I want to do my best as a parent so I will not have any regrets. I hope you feel the same way. May GOD help us to raise our children to go to heaven.
Ken Tyler, THE EXHORTER, ARAB CHURCH OF CHRIST 3 4 1990
THE UNHEALTHY HOME
“Sometimes one has the impression that the child is practically begging and pleading for the adult to act like an adult, to step into the situation and say NO – and that’s it, no more discussion . . . but he/she cannot get the parents to cooperate.”
“This pungent comment, made by Dr. Joseph D Noshpitz, hits the right spot for a permissive society which we have today. Too long have we heard about child frustrations and inhibitions by such as Dr. Spock and a host of others. It is time now for some common sense to be heard.
“Dr. Noshpitz published a book, Children’s House, (1970) and in it he tries to reach the parents who have a hang-up about saying “NO” to their children. He mentions four kinds of such parents.
“1. Those who cannot say “NO” to themselves in matters of smoking, drinking, dieting, buying, gambling, . . . They get their feelings hurt when someone says, “No” to them, so they assume their children will do the same.
“2. Those who are afraid of losing the child’s love. They misunderstand the proper use of discipline. Dr. Noshpitz points out there is a “peculiar similarity between the child who is deprived and the one who is over gratified.” Often, they will both come out of such childhood early experiences “feeling cheated, angry and bitter.”
“3. The intellectual parents who are full of psychological theory and worry lest they frustrate their children. Their children often react with arrogance, violence, impulsivity and temper tantrums.
“4. Those who enjoy acting up by the children. These parents say they do not want to curtail the child’s individuality, talents or spontaneity. But in all of this they fail to teach the children self-discipline.
“Dr. Noshpitz goes on to say that certain homes become “unhealthy” for children. “The child has everything done for him, given to him, and forgiven him is a deprived child. A home that has no taboos, makes no demands, requires no politeness or conformity, that sets no firm rules and limits is a home that is “unhealthy.” Shades of Solomon! Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.” (Proverbs 22:15).”
“We should take note of the fact that the command of obedience is made to children and not to parents (Ephesian 6:1).”
Roy. H. Lanier Jr.
San Marcos TX.