We all have been there. Maybe some of us more than others. Disappointment is defined as “(of a person) sad or displeased (feeling or showing annoyance and displeasure) because someone or something has failed to fulfill one’s hopes or expectations.” Another definition of disappointment is not having our expectations met, which then causes us to blame others or ourselves. For some, we are our own worst enemies when it comes to life, and we blame ourselves for every mistake made (even if it is not our mistake). We never know how many burdens some people deal with because of their feelings of inadequacy, and their failings in times past. We struggle with meeting the standards that we set for ourselves, and this creates feelings of inadequacy to the point of causing some to just give up.
We feel disappointed when our expectations are not met, and then we tend to blame either others or ourselves. GOD sent his Son, Jesus, to live among us and experience our disappointment. The night Jesus was betrayed, he expressed his great disappointment to his closest companions: “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death…My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me…Friends, could you not watch with me one hour?” (Matt 26:38-40, ESV). On the cross, his disappointment climaxed: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matt 27:46).
Jesus’ disappointment didn’t turn him away from his Father. He didn’t blame himself for expecting too much from a darkened world. He didn’t bend the situation to his own will, coming down from the cross or calling angels to fight for him. No, rather than running away from God, Jesus let his disappointment bring him closer to God. His dying words were: “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit” (Luke 23:46).
As Hebrews puts it, Jesus was a son who “learned obedience through what he suffered. And being made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation to all who obey him.” (Hebrews 5:8-9). In other words, because Jesus drew close to God through his suffering and disappointment, he opened the way for you and me to do the same. He died to bring us salvation, and he lives to bring us close to the Father, despite our disappointment.
Disappointment will come into all our lives because of our expectations. So how do we deal with disappointment?
ACCEPT IT. Some say, “I just won’t think about it.” But this often causes us to thinK about it that much more.
DON’T IGNORE THE NEGATIVE FEELINGS THAT YOU WILL ENCOUNTER. Use these as a springboard for prayer and an encouragement to think and act like our Savior “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” When you pray for others the disappointment will get easier, as you have turned this over to God.
ADJUST YOUR EXPECTATIONS. Some people will disappoint you. Know that as you go into a situation with that person.
LEARN FROM IT. This is an opportunity to grow and learn.
GET PERSEPCTIVE. Talk with others who have struggle with these things. Perhaps the one(s) who have disappointed us have problems of their own and did not mean to do what they did. Talk to others who can give us a better understanding.
FINALLY, SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE CHRISTIANS. Always consider what Jesus has done for all the world, and what he will do for those who seek to follow Him.
Disappointments will come – seek the Lord. Look at His example.
Tommy